Day 22 Lonely

 Our church runs a cafe.   Its a brilliant wee place where all sorts of people from the community stop by for all sorts of reasons.  Apart from selling great coffee and buns, its a place that Mums can bring kids and not worry about them making a noise .  Quite a few laptops come out over the course of the week as  working people answer their emails whilst slurping their tea.  Friends gather to chat and shoot the breeze.  And lonely people come in for a chat and a laugh, and sometimes a cry and a pray.  There are alot of people out there who really have few relationships and nobody with whom to have a coffee.  The whole point of our coffee shop is to make connections  

 Thinking yesterday about Jesus being brave, today Im thinking about Him being lonely.  We can probably all identify with moments of loneliness in our lives.  After a bereavement,  when the kids fly the nest, when we move house or church or job and have to make new friendships.  But theres a whole other level of loneliness which, I think, is a spiritual thing.  It is a feeling of utter disconnect even when there are plenty of people around.  Its a shouting in your head that you are on you own, nobody sees you, nobody cares - I suppose it crosses over with depression quite a bit, but I dont think its the same.  Plenty of people live solitary lives and aren't lonely ( watch Ben Fogle meeting people who live alone in the wilderness)  But plenty are cripplingly lonely in a crowd.

Jesus had 12 friends with Him pretty much 24/7 in the last 3 years of His life. He partied.  He did sleepovers with His mate Lazarus. He cuddled small children.  But at the end of the day nobody quite understood what He was about.  The disciples got as far as acknowledging that He was Messiah, but when it came to that last, lonely week they were clueless.   There can be few things more isolating than being passionate about a cause that those nearest to you dont get.  Nobody more lonely than Jesus in the garden realising that His friends couldn't stay awake to pray for Him when He really really needed them. And of course the heart-breaking cry from the cross - Father why have you forsaken me?  A cosmic loneliness which is the destiny for all those who dont accept Jesus as Lord and Saviour.

I think God allows us to catch a glimpse of what it feels like to be lonely sometimes.  Its awful.  Really crippling. And of course it is a lie because we are never alone.  The disconnect He allows us to feel can, and should, push us into Jesus, but even that can be hard when the abyss has opened up within.  The answer lies in other people.  As with all things, bringing it into the light is most of the solution. The enemy works in darkness.  The problem is that saying ' Im lonely' to someone can feel like a plea of attention, or as if you are asking that person for friendship rather than prayer.  But I can only tell you from my own experience that saying it out loud and asking for specific targeted prayer really does work. The abyss goes, the chasm closes over, the voices stop. Even if the outward circumstances dont change.  And the reason for that is that Jesus took our loneliness, our disconnect and isolation on the cross.  And He buried it in a tomb.  And when He rose it was to perfect fellowship and unbreakable love with The Father in everlasting communion and connectedness.  And so it shall be for us.